I Confess

O God, where do I begin?

You already know it all, what I’ve done…and I guess so do I,
so where do I start so that You will know…
that I know that I’m broken
and in the wrong.

It has to be my lack of understanding
My inability to see or hear
For I know that You are a good God

But if Your ways are not mine
And if Your thoughts are above mine
Then what am I to do?
Really.

I’ll tell You I’m a sinner…
I’ll shout it from the mountain top -- if that helps.
I’m aware I’m a hypocrite. You know, “Fake it ‘till you make it!”
always with a smile! :)
It’s clear that what I want to do I don’t do
and what I do is not what I want to do.

You know it! I know it!
I’m sorry. Really. Truly.

I’m trying to confess to You NOT in hopes of making a bargain.
I’m trying to confess to You without hopes of repayment.
I’m trying to confess to You in hopes of a clean, well…cleaner, heart

That’s what I’m trying to do!
That’s what I want to do

But since I’m being honest here…

I’m open to bargaining.
You don’t owe me anything, but my hands are open.
But I do want, need, desire that clean heart!

Maybe the most honest confession is…
that I really don’t know what I want
that I really don’t know what we need
that I really don’t know who You are or who I am.

Is that a good confession?